I have stood before the crosses as we laid a soldier down. They cast a simple shadow upon the upturned ground The bugler sounds taps as each cross its witness bears to the journey of a soldier released from earthly cares. I have stood before the crosses and prayed a lonely prayer, in hopes of some redemption as I struggled to compare My life of long contentment with the soldier’s hallowed call to warrant with his dying breath a better world for all. I have stood before the upturned ground and struggled to compare my courage and my character with the man or woman there. Would I have died a valiant death in a foreign land, upon a distant battlefield, to save my fellow man? I have stood before the crosses as the sun was going down, watching as the shadows faded upon the upturned ground. I have looked upon the hillside of the crosses, row on row, upon the young and brave of heart never to grow old. I have knelt before the crosses at night, before I sleep, and made upon my bended knee a covenant I keep: To live a life of service, to honor all our losses, for those who went before us, those beneath the crosses.
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Memorial Day is an American holiday on which those who died in active military service are remembered. It’s a day for honoring and mourning people who’ve died while fighting to keep us safe. It’s a time many visit friends and family who have made the ultimate sacrifice.
Originally known as Decoration Day, it originated in the years following the Civil War and became an official federal holiday in 1971. In 1966 the federal government declared Waterloo, New York, the official birthplace of Memorial Day. It was traditionally observed on May 30 but is now officially observed on the last Monday in May.
Florida National Cemetery where my grandfather is buried
John McCrae wrote the poem In Flanders Fields in 1915 as a memorial to those who died in a World War I battle fought in a region of Belgium known as the Ypres Salient. McCrae himself treated many of the soldiers injured in that battle and was particularly moved by the death of a close friend, Alexis Helmer. This poem helped popularize the red poppy as a symbol of remembrance.
Gone but not forgotten
In Flanders Fields
BY JOHN MCCRAE In Flanders fields the poppies blow Between the crosses, row on row, That mark our place; and in the sky The larks, still bravely singing, fly Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow, Loved and were loved, and now we lie, In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe: To you from failing hands we throw The torch; be yours to hold it high. If ye break faith with us who die We shall not sleep, though poppies grow In Flanders fields.
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My grandmother receiving the American flag at my grandfather’s funeral in 2018
For the last several years I’ve been on a personal spiritual journey. I’ve been discovering what I believe and why I believe what I do. Spurred on by finding myself frustrated by different difficult situations in my church community, I found myself broken and questioning. I don’t yet have all the answers that I am looking for. The journey has had its ups and downs and twists and turns. Along the way, my beautiful kind sister, Sarah has been instrumental in helping me to navigate.
Today I am sharing a piece so graciously and eloquently written by her from her heart. She put into words what’s been knocking around my head and heart for months and years!
My beautiful kind sister Sarah Aheron
At the risk of vulnerability, I feel compelled to share this.
Over the past few years, I have participated in multiple conversations and shed many tears with people from different walks of life who have been deeply affected by spiritual abuse. Books, websites, podcasts, conferences, and even whole ministries are devoted to helping those who have experience with it.
For those of you who have no experience with this kind of abuse, praise God, but please be aware that the person sitting beside you in Bible study, worshipping behind you in service, or praying next to you in life group may be dealing with deeply seeded wounds planted by spiritually abusive systems, doctrines, and/or leaders. And for every person still struggling to engage in community with other believers after having experienced spiritual abuse, there are countless more who physically cannot enter a church building without reliving trauma.
“Whether subtle or obvious, spiritual abuse is a form of trauma that undermines your relationship with yourself and with God.”
The Allender Center defines spiritual abuse for their “Confronting Spiritual Abuse” conference as, “The use of religious or spiritual power and authority to control, coerce, or perpetrate harm. In many ways, spiritual abuse is a distortion or exploitation of God’s power and authority to manipulate or control others’ bodies, personhood, relationships, and autonomy through shame and fear. Spiritually abusive systems and organizations and spiritually abusive people use religious texts, theologies, and practices to harm relationally, emotionally, and physically.”
Spiritual abuse, as defined here, is the very antithesis of 1 Timothy 1:7-10, where we read, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me His prisoner, but share with me in the sufferings for the gospel according to the power of God, who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began, but has now been revealed by the appearing of our Savior Jesus Christ, who has abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, to which I was appointed a preacher, an apostle, and a teacher of the Gentiles. For this reason I also suffer these things; nevertheless I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep what I have committed to Him until that Day.”
The gospel is redemptive. It heals, restores, transforms, forgives, empowers, and frees. So, brothers and sisters, if you have suffered or are currently suffering, not for this gospel’s sake, but at the hands of some other gospel; please know that there is hope and healing as we rest in faith through the grace Jesus Christ displayed in his ultimate sacrificial suffering on the cross.
You are not alone on your journey. You belong. You are wanted...not for how well you perform; how hard you work; how consistently you attend gatherings; how connected you are; how committed you are to institutional standards; how well you dress; how intensely you serve, how eloquently you speak; how much money you give; how well-behaved your children are; how glowing your reputation is; how well you fit into a mold; how talented, gifted or educated you are; how dedicated you are to a cause…but you are wanted because you are accepted in the Beloved. Chosen. Adopted. Redeemed.
I know our healing journey may be long, and unsteady; but I believe the “Confronting Spiritual Abuse” conference may be a place to start or rest along the way.
In many ways, spiritual abuse is a distortion or exploitation of God’s power and authority to manipulate or control others’ bodies, personhood, relationships, and autonomy through shame and fear.
Stop by and visit my Instagram page @lookingjoligood. Generally, I post pictures of food, plants and puppies, but there are pictures of makeup and beauty products as well. I would love for you to follow me on Twitter and Facebook. You can find me as Looking Joli Good. I would also love to follow you on Instagram and Twitter as well, so let me know your user name in the comment section below!
Happy, Mother’s Day… To some, like me, Mother’s day is a day of happiness and celebrations. Some of us feel surrounded by love on Mother’s Day. We have wonderful mothers and grandmothers and are blessed with great children.
That is not the case for everyone. Some people view Mother’s Day as a painful reminder of loss. Loss of a mother or grandmother, loss of a child, or loss of a relationship, loss of a dream, or loss of expectations. Seeing others celebrate might exacerbate those feelings of loss.
So for today, I am saying “Happy, Mother’s Day…” to those who are Mothers 💐 to those who are Mothers to be💐 to those who lost Mothers💐 to those Mothers who have lost children💐 to those women who are step-mother’s 💐 to those women who are longing to be Mothers💐 to those women with difficult Mother relationships💐 to those women with difficult child relationships💐 to those women who have chosen not to be Mothers💐 to those women who are dog and cat Mothers💐 to everyone who is celebrating their Mother💐
Happy Mother’s Day
Stop by and visit my Instagram page as well @lookingjoligood. Generally, I post pictures of food, plants and puppies, but there are pictures of makeup and beauty products as well. I would love for you to follow me on Twitter and Facebook. You can find me as Looking Joli Good. I would also love to follow you on Instagram and Twitter as well, so let me know your user name in the comment section below!
1 Corinthians 13:1-3 speaks about what happens when things are done without love…
If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love. (The Message Bible: emphasis added by me)
So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.
1 Corinthians 13 4-7 goes on to tell us what true love looks like…
Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. Love doesn’t strut, Doesn’t have a swelled head, Doesn’t force itself on others, Isn’t always “me first,” Doesn’t fly off the handle, Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, Doesn’t revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end.
The Best Way to Prevent Bankruptcy Is By Being Loving In All You Do.
Stop by and visit my Instagram page as well @lookingjoligood. Generally, I post pictures of food, plants and puppies, but there are pictures of makeup and beauty products as well. I would love for you to follow me on Twitter and Facebook. You can find me as Looking Joli Good. I would also love to follow you on Instagram and Twitter as well, so let me know your user name in the comment section below!
I am never one to get into discussions about political things online, but… After Rush Limbaugh, a prominent right wing talking head, recently passed away from lung cancer, many Christian conservatives were getting their feathers all ruffled over negative things being said about him. They feel the need to defend a man that had been profiting by spreading divisive hate for years. A man who, for thirty years as the most listened to person in radio, used his loud voice and strong words to chew up and spit out anyone who was different than him. For thirty years he spread hate, racist bigotry, misogyny, and cruelty.
Theses Christian conservatives in turn have taken to revising history to praise him as a blameless patriotic saint. A saint who in 2010 while criticizing the school lunch program, said that if hungry children have no food at home and can’t afford McDonalds, “There’s another place, if none of these options work, to find food. There’s always the neighborhood dumpster. Now you might find competition with homeless people there, but there are videos that have been produced to show you how to healthfully dine and how to dumpster dive, and survive until school kicks back up…” This type of comment is just the tip of the iceberg of the vitriol of hate he spewed for decades.
Just a few highlights of the cruelty of Rush Limbaugh include: ridiculing Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s cancer diagnosis and Michael J. Fox’s Parkinson’s disease. He mocked people who needed public assistance, hated Civil Rights activists and Native Americans. Took pleasure in the deaths of people who had AIDS. Made jokes about Eric Garner’s 2014 death via chokehold by an NYPD officer.
The 2020 winner of the Presidential Medal of Freedom awarded by U.S. President Donald Trump, while on television in 1993 inferred that Chelsea Clinton was an ugly dog. While holding a picture of the 13-year-old, Rush Limbaugh said “Socks is the White House cat. But did you know there is also a White House dog?”
I know that as a 12 or 13 year old girl, Chelsea being called a dog by a “respected” adult male on national television, whether as a “joke” or not, must have negatively stuck with her for years. He showed by picking on a child that no blow was too low for him and nothing was off limits.
Laughing at the expense of others should not be accepted as mainstream.
A voice of reason as long as you look and think exactly like he does. Thanks Franklin Graham for once again standing up for kindness and Christ like love…
Let’s ask ourselves why do a lot of Christian conservatives like and defend him? Is it because he is pointing them towards the two greatest commandments to Love God and Love others? Or maybe he is encouraging them to follow what is said in James 1:27 where the Bible describes true religion as caring for the widows and the orphans while not being corrupted by the world… Or might it actually be because he was getting away with, being paid for, and praised for saying out loud the rude, mean, racist, bigoted, misogynistic, and hateful things they are thinking and wanted to say themselves yet know they shouldn’t?
What is true religion?!
Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you. James 1:27
Taking care of and generously loving those who can never repay you, those who you cannot profit from, those who have nothing to offer in return is what true Christ like love and godly religion is.
Finally… Just in case you were wondering…. This might come as a shock to some “conservative” people, but Christians, no matter how conservative you are, being racist is wrong! It’s a sin! You cannot follow the second greatest commandment to love your neighbor and say and post racist things! Saying, posting, even thinking rude mean racist things disguised as patriotism: Still Wrong! Don’t fool yourself that your “patriotic” hate is justified. Please stop!
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Looking Joli Good 