I’ve always been a bit of a perfectionist. I like to do things right, and I don’t like to make mistakes. This can be a good thing, but it can also be a bit of a hindrance. Sometimes, I’m so focused on doing things perfectly that I don’t allow myself to learn from my mistakes.
That’s where constructive criticism comes in. Constructive criticism is feedback that is given in a way that is helpful and not hurtful. It’s about pointing out areas where you can improve, without making you feel bad about yourself.
I’ve learned to embrace constructive criticism over the years. I’ve realized that it’s not a personal attack, but rather an opportunity to grow and learn. When I receive constructive criticism, I try to listen to it with an open mind. I ask myself if there’s any truth to what the person is saying, and if there is, I try to figure out how I can improve.
When someone offers me constructive criticism, it’s an opportunity for me to see things from a different perspective. It helps me step outside of my own bubble and gain valuable insights into how I can become better. Instead of feeling defensive or hurt, I try to embrace the feedback with an open mind and a willingness to learn.
Of course, not all criticism is constructive. There’s a fine line between providing helpful feedback and simply being negative. That’s why I value constructive criticism from people who I trust want to help me become a better version of myself. With their help the focus is on identifying areas for improvement while offering practical suggestions for growth. It’s a way of highlighting my strengths and weaknesses without tearing me down.
Constructive criticism has helped me to identify my weaknesses and work on them. It’s also helped me to become more resilient. I’ve learned that it’s okay to make mistakes, as long as I learn from them.
If you’re like me and you’re not always open to constructive criticism, I encourage you to give it a try. It can be a powerful tool for growth and improvement.
Here are some tips I have been working on for receiving constructive criticism in a positive way:
Listen to the feedback with an open mind.
Don’t take it personally.
Ask questions to clarify anything you don’t understand.
Thank the person for their feedback.
Set a goal to improve in the area that was criticized.
Constructive criticism can be a valuable tool for growth and improvement. If you’re willing to listen to it with an open mind, it can help you to become a better version of yourself.
Disclaimer: The information provided is based on my personal experiences, research, and ongoing learning and growth. While I strive to provide accurate and helpful insights, it is important to consult with appropriate professionals or experts for specific advice or guidance. I encourage you to approach the information with a critical mindset and consider your own unique circumstances before making any decisions or taking any actions.
Being kind doesn’t equate to weakness, and being rude doesn’t necessarily indicate strength.
In my experience, I’ve learned that kindness is a virtue that should never be mistaken for weakness. There’s a common misconception that being kind means being a pushover or lacking the strength to stand up for oneself. But in reality, kindness is a reflection of inner strength and compassion.
When I choose kindness, I do so not because I’m incapable of asserting myself, but because I understand the power it holds. Kindness has the ability to uplift others, mend broken relationships, and create a positive ripple effect in the world. It takes strength to rise above negativity and extend kindness even in challenging situations.
However, it’s important to note that strength doesn’t equate to rudeness or aggression. True strength lies in the ability to remain composed, respectful, and assertive while standing up for what we believe in. It means having the courage to express our opinions and boundaries without resorting to harsh words or actions.
Strength without empathy and understanding can easily become a weapon, causing harm rather than encouraging growth and harmony. Rudeness, on the other hand, often stems from a place of insecurity or a desire to exert dominance. It may create an illusion of strength in the moment, but it ultimately erodes trust, damages relationships, and leads to isolation.
I firmly believe that strength is best demonstrated when combined with kindness and compassion. It’s about being firm but fair, standing up for our values while treating others with dignity and respect. This approach not only garners more positive outcomes but also helps to build healthier and more harmonious connections with those around us.
By embracing kindness and strength as complementary qualities, we create a balanced and authentic version of ourselves. We become people who are strong enough to face challenges with grace, while also nurturing a supportive and caring environment. In this way, we inspire others to find their own strength and discover the transformative power of kindness.
Kindness and strength can coexist harmoniously. Kindness doesn’t make us weak, but rather showcases our capacity for empathy and understanding. And strength, when paired with kindness, becomes a force that uplifts and empowers not only ourselves but also those we interact with.
Here are some tips for being both kind and strong:
Be assertive. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself, but do it in a way that is respectful and kind.
Be confident. Believe in yourself and your abilities. This will help you to be more assertive and less likely to be taken advantage of.
Be compassionate. Understand that everyone makes mistakes, and that even people who are mean to you may be going through a difficult time.
Be forgiving. Let go of grudges and resentments. Holding onto anger and bitterness will only hurt you in the long run.
Being both kind and strong is not always easy, but it is possible. If you work at it, you can learn to be the best version of yourself.
Disclaimer: The information provided is based on my personal experiences, research, and ongoing learning and growth. While I strive to provide accurate and helpful insights, it is important to consult with appropriate professionals or experts for specific advice or guidance. I encourage you to approach the information with a critical mindset and consider your own unique circumstances before making any decisions or taking any actions.
I recently had a conversation with someone who was very passionate about the topic we were discussing. While I wasn’t particularly invested in the subject, I also didn’t agree with their point of view. As they started to get heated, I stated, “Let’s agree to disagree.” They quickly replied, “No, we need to get on the same page on this issue.” I simply stated, “We are not even at the same library, never mind the same book nor page.” They tried to continued the conversation and I stated again, “Let’s agree to disagree.” Once again they declined and continued to debate the topic. I stated, “Whether you agree to disagree or not, that is exactly what we are going to do, because I don’t plan on changing my view to match yours, and I’d rather not argue about it.”
When it comes to human interaction, one of the most fundamental principles is the ability to agree to disagree. This phrase encapsulates the idea that people can maintain amicable relationships and engage in productive conversations, even when they hold opposing viewpoints. (While I was able to keep my cool in the above scenario, that is not always the case when it comes to me agreeing to disagree. I’m sure if I were the one debating about a subject I am passionate about I might have been less inclined to agree to disagree. )
The notion of agreeing to disagree is frequently called upon when people find themselves at odds over certain beliefs, values, or opinions. It is a practical approach to handle disagreements without causing unnecessary conflict or hostility. Instead of engaging in a fruitless battle to convert someone to your viewpoint or shutting down a conversation entirely, this approach encourages mutual respect and creates a peaceful coexistence of differing ideas.
The phrase “agree to disagree” should not be misunderstood as an endorsement of the opposing viewpoint. Rather, it signifies a willingness to coexist with differing opinions, acknowledging the legitimacy of someone else’s perspective while maintaining the integrity of one’s own convictions.
Agreeing to disagree demonstrates tolerance for diversity of thought and respect for individual autonomy. It upholds the principle that people have a right to their own beliefs and that these beliefs should be respected, even if they differ from our own. Engaging in a constant battle to change someone’s viewpoint can be exhausting and counterproductive.
Many issues and ideas are multifaceted and complex, making it unreasonable to expect everyone to share the same perspective. By agreeing to disagree, we recognize that there may be valid reasons for differing opinions and that not all issues can be reduced to a simple right or wrong. When people feel safe to express their opinions without fear of judgment or backlash, it creates open and honest dialogue. This, in turn, can lead to a better understanding of different viewpoints and, on occasion, even a change of mind.(Keep in mind, as discussed in a previous post, your perception is your reality, but just because something is a perceived reality doesn’t mean it is the truth.)
It’s important to distinguish between agreeing to disagree and passive agreement. Passive agreement implies a lack of critical thinking or a willingness to go along with any viewpoint presented, which is not what agreeing to disagree is about. Instead, agreeing to disagree encourages thoughtful reflection and the recognition that people can genuinely hold opposing views based on their unique experiences and perspectives.
The concept of “agree to disagree” is a valuable tool for navigating complex human interactions, especially when confronted with differing opinions. It embodies the spirit of tolerance, respect, and open dialogue while allowing others to maintain their own beliefs and convictions. So, just because someone is not actively disagreeing with you doesn’t mean they agree with you; they may simply be practicing the art of agreeing to disagree.
Now let’s talk about this concept in terms of the high control religious group I grew up in…
Navigating the concept of “agreeing to disagree” within Independent Fundamental Baptist (IFB) communities poses significant challenges. These challenges arise from the strong emphasis placed on doctrinal uniformity and conformity to specific beliefs and practices and behaviors. The IFB’s focus on theological rigidity can make it particularly hard for individuals within these communities to embrace differing viewpoints.
One key factor contributing to this difficulty is the presence of a set of core beliefs within IFB churches that are considered non-negotiable. These beliefs range from strict interpretations of Scripture to moral and ethical codes, and members are expected to adhere to them unquestionably. This strict adherence can create an environment where questioning or expressing alternative beliefs is discouraged.
Additionally, there’s often a fear of potential consequences for those who speak out against established doctrine within IFB communities. These consequences may include social ostracization, expulsion, or being labeled as a rebel. This fear can be a significant deterrent for people considering voicing dissenting opinions.
The close-knit and isolated nature of IFB communities makes it challenging to accept diverse perspectives. This isolation reinforces the belief that their own views are the only correct ones.
The hierarchical structure in IFB churches is a critical factor in the reluctance to embrace the concept of “agreeing to disagree.” In these communities, pastors and church leaders often hold immense authority and power. Challenging established teachings or expressing differing beliefs can be seen not just as questioning doctrine but as challenging the authority of these leaders.
Within IFB churches, questioning authority is often discouraged, if not outright condemned. Pastors are typically regarded as spiritual authorities who have been anointed by God to guide the congregation. This perception of authority is reinforced by the idea that they have a direct line to God’s will and that questioning them is akin to questioning God himself. As a result, congregants may be hesitant to express disagreements or differing beliefs, fearing not only the potential social consequences but also spiritual repercussions.
Furthermore, pastors within IFB communities are often trained in a specific doctrinal framework, which they are expected to uphold and defend. They may not be receptive to alternative viewpoints, as this can be seen as undermining their authority and the doctrinal integrity of the church. This resistance to being disagreed with, combined with the hierarchical structure, further discourages open discussions of differing beliefs and contributes to the overall difficulty of embracing diverse perspectives within IFB churches.
The fear of severe spiritual consequences for straying from established doctrine is a powerful force within IFB communities. This fear encompasses a range of concerns, including the dread of potential damnation or eternal punishment for holding or expressing beliefs that differ from the accepted norms. This fear can be paralyzing, effectively discouraging individuals from openly discussing or even questioning differences in belief. It creates a climate where conformity is not only encouraged but enforced, as any deviation is viewed as a grave risk to one’s spiritual well-being. Consequently, this fear reinforces the existing rigid structures and can be a significant barrier to embracing diverse perspectives within these communities.
Promoting a culture of respectful dialogue and understanding is a positive step toward creating an environment where people can acknowledge and discuss differences without the fear of dire consequences. Changing the deeply ingrained mindset of doctrinal rigidity within some IFB communities may never happen, and in turn, we’ll just have to agree to disagree about it.
Disclaimer:It’s important to acknowledge that this is my opinion based on my own life experiences. It’s essential to recognize that not all people within IFB churches find it impossible to “agree to disagree.” Some may be more open to dialogue and respectful of differing viewpoints, acknowledging that genuine faith can coexist alongside diverse beliefs.People have diverse experiences and perceptions, and some may genuinely enjoy and benefit from their involvement in the IFB. I may disagree, but unlike what I experienced while in the IFB I do not intend to diminish or invalidate those positive experiences but rather seeks to highlight the complexities of personal perspectives and their role in shaping our understanding of the world.
Recently I’ve been thinking about the concept of “your perception is your reality.” While this is absolutely true there is another side to that concept, just because something is a perceived reality doesn’t mean it is the truth. Let me explain…
A little while ago, I found myself in a heated discussion with a friend. We had been discussing a controversial topic, and it seemed like our viewpoints were irreconcilable. I firmly believed I was right, and I felt that my perception of the situation was unquestionably the absolute truth.
As the discussion continued, I became increasingly frustrated. It felt like my friend was intentionally ignoring the facts, and I couldn’t understand how they could be so blind to what I saw as the obvious reality. I even started questioning our friendship, wondering how someone I cared about could hold such misguided beliefs.
Then, during one particularly intense exchange, my friend paused and said something that stuck with me ever since: “I understand where you’re coming from, and I respect your perspective. But remember, your perception is your reality, and so is mine.”
Those words hit me like a revelation. I realized that while I was convinced of the righteousness of my position, my friend was equally convinced of theirs. We were both seeing the same situation through our unique lenses, shaped by our life experiences, values, and beliefs.
After some reflection, I decided to take a step back and consider my friend’s viewpoint more seriously. I began researching the topic from different angles, seeking out various opinions and sources of information. In doing so, I discovered that the issue was far more complex than I had initially thought.
As I gained a deeper understanding of the subject, my perspective started to shift. I saw that my initial perception, while valid in many aspects, was not the whole truth. It was a humbling realization, and it taught me the importance of humility and open-mindedness.
This experience served as a reminder that in our interactions with others and our understanding of the world, it’s essential to acknowledge that our perception is just one piece of the puzzle. Embracing the idea that your perception is your reality, but just because something is a perceived reality doesn’t mean it is the truth has since guided me in approaching disagreements and complex issues with an open mind and willingness to learn. The truth often lies somewhere in the middle, influenced by objective facts and multiple perspectives.
Ultimately, my friend and I didn’t completely agree on the issue, but our friendship remained intact. We had both learned a valuable lesson about the nature of perception and truth. It became clear that while our perceptions were our individual realities, there was often a more nuanced and multifaceted truth that required exploration and empathy.
Just because something feels true doesn’t necessarily make it an absolute truth that applies universally. Our perception is like a filter through which we view the world. It can sometimes distort or color the reality around us. It’s like wearing tinted glasses; the world may look a certain way through them, but that’s not how it appears to someone else with a different pair of glasses. (Occasionally, we wear rose-colored glasses, making it extremely challenging to notice red flags.)
Our beliefs, experiences, and upbringing all come together to create our personal worldview. And there’s nothing wrong with that – it’s a fundamental part of being human. However, true reality often exists beyond our perceptions, influenced by objective facts and varying viewpoints. Recognizing the distinction between our personal reality and the objective truth is essential for open-mindedness, empathy, and personal growth. It reminds us that there’s always room for learning and evolving our understanding of the world.
Imagine a room with people from different backgrounds and experiences. Each person might describe the room differently based on where they’re standing or what they’re focusing on. Their descriptions would be their personal realities, shaped by their unique viewpoints.
Growing up in the Independent Fundamental Baptist (IFB) community, I was surrounded by a set of beliefs and practices that were presented as absolute truth. From a young age, I was taught that our way of life was the only path to righteousness. This community was my entire world, and my perception of reality was shaped by its teachings.
One of the core beliefs in the IFB was the notion that the outside world was a morally corrupt and dangerous place. We were repeatedly told that secular influences were leading people astray, and that our isolation from these influences was crucial for our salvation. This belief was ingrained in me to the point where I viewed the outside world with suspicion and even fear.
As a result, I grew up sheltered from many aspects of the real world. I was discouraged from pursuing friendships with non-believers, and my education was filtered through a strictly religious lens. While I believed that I was living a righteous and protected life, I was also unaware of the diversity of experiences and perspectives beyond my community.
It wasn’t until I was an adult that I began to question my perception of reality. As I ventured into the wider world, I encountered people from various backgrounds and beliefs. I realized that the “dangerous” world I had been warned about wasn’t so perilous after all. People from different walks of life were kind, compassionate, and lived by their own moral codes.
This awakening challenged the core belief I had held for so long: that the perception of reality within the IFB was the only valid one. I began to understand that my upbringing had provided me with a narrow view of the world. While the IFB had taught me that their way was the absolute truth, I came to see that truth is often subjective and influenced by one’s perspective.
The IFB had instilled in me the idea that their perception was the only reality, but leaving the community had shown me that my reality through their view was limited and biased. I learned that just because something is a perceived reality, it doesn’t necessarily equate to the universal truth. This realization encouraged me to be more open-minded, empathetic, and willing to engage with diverse perspectives.
In retrospect, my journey out of the IFB taught me that questioning one’s perception of reality is essential for personal growth. It’s a reminder that our beliefs, no matter how deeply ingrained, should be subject to scrutiny and self-reflection. While my time in the IFB was a part of my reality, it’s not the only truth, and I now embrace a more inclusive and open-minded outlook on the world.
The distinction between our personal reality and objective truth is vital. It reminds us that there’s always more to learn and discover. It encourages us to be open-minded, to listen to others, and to consider alternative perspectives.
Disclaimer:It’s important to acknowledge that this is my opinion based on my own life experiences. While this discussion explores the concept of perception and reality within life and in the context of the IFB, I fully understand that there are individuals who find genuine fulfillment and happiness within religion and the IFB community. People have diverse experiences and perceptions, and some may genuinely enjoy and benefit from their involvement in the IFB. I ay disagree, but unlike what I experienced while in the IFB I do not intend to diminish or invalidate those positive experiences but rather seeks to highlight the complexities of personal perspectives and their role in shaping our understanding of the world.
Have you ever known someone who believed that surrounding themselves with positivity meant avoiding anything that challenged or confronted them? It seems as if they believed that in order to stay positive, they needed to shield themselves from any form of criticism or opposing viewpoints. They actively seek out environments where dissenting opinions were suppressed or dismissed. Their goal was to create a seemingly serene and harmonious atmosphere, but deep down, it felt like they were hiding from reality. And in reality, it only led to a fragile façade that prevented them from experiencing true growth and happiness.
Overall, I consider myself to be an optimistic person. While I do lean towards reality, I prefer to look on the brighter side of things. But let’s talk about something that often goes unnoticed in our pursuit of positivity: toxic positivity. It’s something I’ve been thinking about lately.
Toxic positivity is when focus is excessively on positive thinking to the point where it dismisses or invalidates genuine human emotions and experiences. It’s like putting up a front of constant happiness and optimism, while suppressing any negative feelings. It creates this pressure to always be cheerful and masks the reality of our true emotions.
In my own experiences, I once had a friend who consistently exuded an unwavering positivity. They wholeheartedly embraced the concept of “positive vibes only.” However, as time went on, I started to discern the toxic undertones that lay beneath their cheerful façade . Whenever I shared my concerns or struggles, they would deflect, change the subject, or even chastise me for being negative. Instead of offering empathy or understanding, they would dismiss my worries as mere illusions, leaving me feeling invalidated in my experiences.
While the idea of “when life hands you lemons, make lemonade” can promote a positive and proactive mindset in the face of adversity, it is crucial to recognize that life’s difficulties cannot always be overcome by simply applying such a cliché. Some situations demand deeper introspection, problem-solving, or seeking external support. Relying solely on a one-size-fits-all positive approach may fall short when confronted with the complexities of real-life challenges.
I’ve realized that there’s a significant difference between what I used to think of as positivity and what I now see as genuine optimism.
Toxic positivity, often hailed as a universal remedy, can be just as detrimental as constant negativity. While negativity fixates on problems, toxic positivity denies their existence altogether. Both approaches hinder problem-solving and personal growth, as they fail to acknowledge and address the complexities and nuances of life.
When it comes to solving problems, finding a balance is key. It means recognizing the challenges we face while keeping a proactive mindset. By taking a realistic approach, we can tackle obstacles head-on, explore different solutions, and make progress towards resolving them.
While positivity is undoubtedly valuable, it’s crucial to be mindful of the potential pitfalls of toxic positivity. Sometimes, relying too much on clichés and overly positive thinking can overlook the complexities of our emotions and challenges. It’s important to embrace a more nuanced view, acknowledging the limitations of simplistic catchphrases.
Let me tell you a love story that turned into an unhealthy obsession…I remember when I first got my fitness tracker. I had recently started working out and focusing on becoming a better version of myself. It was an exciting new motivational gadget that promised to help me stay on top of my fitness goals and track my progress. At first, it was incredibly motivating. I would eagerly check my steps, heart rate, and calorie burn throughout the day, striving to meet and exceed my daily targets. Seeing the numbers go up gave me a sense of accomplishment and encouraged me to push myself further in my workouts.
As days turned into weeks and weeks into months, into 12 years, my reliance on the fitness tracker grew. It became a constant companion, always strapped to my wrist, monitoring my every move. While it did keep me accountable and motivated for a while, it eventually turned into an obsession that started to cause anxiety.
I began to feel anxious whenever I couldn’t reach my daily targets.I didn’t want to move around too much or take any steps if I wasn’t wearing my tracker, every step needed to be accounted for! Missing a day of exercise or falling short of my step count would send me into a spiral of self-criticism and disappointment. It felt like the fitness tracker was just another way of judging whether I was succeeding or failing. I was giving myself an invisible test every single day that my success or failure was determined by the metrics on the tracker. It was supposed to be a helpful tool, but it started to feel like a demanding taskmaster instead.
The constant focus on numbers and metrics began to overshadow the joy I once found in physical activities. Activities that used to bring me pleasure and a sense of freedom turned into a means of achieving targets and gauging my value. It was no longer about enjoying a walk in nature with my dog or a bike ride on a beautiful day; it was about meeting a step count or burning a specific number of calories.
One day, I decided to take off my fitness tracker and give myself a little break from the constant monitoring. I felt relieved! It was then that I made the decision to break up with my fitness tracker and end our codependent relationship. Like leaving any toxic relationship, it was, dear I say, liberating! Suddenly, I was free from the pressure of meeting daily goals and expectations. I could exercise without feeling like I was being graded. I could move around because I wanted to and not because I felt I needed to “get my steps in.”
In the end, breaking up with my fitness tracker may seem like a small thing, but it was a turning point for me! It allowed me to escape the cycle of anxiety I had gotten myself trapped in and regain a healthier perspective on exercise and fitness. While there was a whole lot more that went into it than just removing the tracker from my wrist, letting go was a big step for me! I know that I am more than just the numbers on a device, and my worth isn’t determined by how many steps I take in a day, but having the tracker on reinforced my need to strive for a goal of perfection.
My experience with wearing a fitness tracker taught me a valuable lesson: my worth and value cannot be defined by numbers or data points. I don’t need a fitness tracker to gauge my worth. My true worth lies in celebrating my progress without fixating on perfection, and nurturing a positive relationship with my body and mind. It comes from recognizing that my value extends far beyond physical achievements, and that I am deserving of love, respect, and happiness simply for being alive. In the end breaking up with the reliance on a fitness device allows me to live a happier life.
Wondering why I became obsessed with my fitness tracker? Check out my post about high-functioning anxiety by clicking HERE!
Disclaimer:The experiences and insights shared in the above post regarding fitness trackers and anxiety are based on personal experiences and should not be construed as professional advice. Each person’s response to fitness trackers may vary, and what works for one person may not work for another. Each person’s fitness journey is unique, and finding a balanced approach that prioritizes mental and emotional well-being is crucial. If you experience anxiety or any other negative emotions related to the use of a fitness tracker, consider seeking guidance from a healthcare professional or fitness expert to find alternative methods that align with your personal needs and goals. If you are considering using a fitness tracker or facing any health-related concerns, it is essential to consult with a qualified healthcare professional or fitness expert for personalized guidance and recommendations.
Like many people, I used to believe that self-care was all about simple acts of treating myself. I enjoy lighting a candle, taking a bath, reading a good book, gratitude journaling, and doing yoga. While these practices are enjoyable and provided a brief escape from the daily grind, I have come to realize that is not enough.
A turning point in my life led me to question the depth of my self-care practices. It was during a particularly challenging period when I found myself overwhelmed constantly prioritizing the needs and wants of others at the expense of my family and my own well-being. During this period of self-reflection, I started to realize the shortcomings of my shallow self-care practices. I couldn’t continue to treat myself poorly all day everyday and expect a Caramel Ribbon Crunch Frappuccino to solve all of my problems.
As I dug deeper into intentional personal growth, my perspective on self-care evolved significantly. It shifted from being solely about momentary relaxation to becoming a continuous dedication to my mental, emotional, and physical well-being. While I still valued lighting a candle and treating myself to a Frappuccino, they were no longer the sole basis of my self-care routine.
Self-care goes beyond lavender baths, candles, and yoga. While gratitude journaling is a positive thing, on it’s own it quite often is not enough. Self-care encompasses the holistic care of your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being. It’s about tuning into your needs and desires and making choices that prioritize your overall health and happiness.
True self-care, I realized, strikes a delicate balance between the soothing moments of external pampering and the depth of self-compassion and boundary-setting. It is an ever-evolving journey, an exploration of nurturing both the external and internal dimensions of oneself, resulting in lasting change and genuine well-being.
Deeper self-care involves setting boundaries. It means learning to say no to things that don’t align with your values or that you simply don’t have time for. It also entails clear communication of your needs and expectations to others. (You can read more about what I have to say about setting boundaries by clicking HERE)
Setting boundaries became a pivotal aspect of my authentic self-care. I recognized that my habit of consistently saying “yes” to others often meant saying “no” to myself, my family, and my own needs. As I acquired the skill of assertively but kindly setting boundaries, I witnessed transformative changes not only in my relationships but also in how I valued and respected myself and my time.
Another facet is the practice of processing your emotions. This involves allowing yourself to feel the full spectrum of your emotions, both positive and negative, without judgment, giving yourself permission to experience them fully. It’s about recognizing that it’s okay to feel sadness, anger, fear, or any other emotion that arises. Rather than pushing these feelings aside or criticizing yourself for having them, you acknowledge their presence with compassion.
Talking to a therapist or a trusted friend can be immensely helpful, as it provides a safe space to express your emotions, gain insights, and receive support. (I am a verbal processor, it is extremely helpful for me to talk through my emotions with a trusted person. If you have ever been one of these people in my life know that I am forever grateful for you. )
Journaling is another powerful way to process emotions. I’m not talking about jotting down 3 things you are grateful for, but writing down your true inner thoughts and feelings. This allows you to explore and make sense of them. It can be a cathartic experience, helping you gain clarity and perspective on your emotions and the situations that trigger them. (Personally, I didn’t even realize some of my true thoughts and feelings until I started writing them out and working through them while journaling.)
For those inclined toward creative expression, such as art, music, or dance, these mediums can serve as valuable outlets for processing emotions. Creating art, whether through painting, sculpture, or other forms, can be a therapeutic means of channeling and externalizing what’s going on inside.
Self-compassion is yet another crucial component of self-care. It’s about treating yourself with kindness and understanding, even when you make mistakes, and accepting yourself for who you are, wounds, scars and all. I am learning to treat myself with the same tenderness and understanding that I readily extended to friends and loved ones. This shift in mindset is allowing me to confront my own struggles and emotions without harsh self-judgment, which has encouraged a sense of inner peace.
I made a deliberate shift in my self-dialogue by replacing negative self-talk with intentional positive affirmations. Instead of criticizing or doubting myself, I began consciously and regularly affirming my worth, capabilities, and potential. These positive affirmations have become a powerful tool to counteract self-limiting beliefs and boost my self-esteem. Over time, this practice not only transformed my mindset but also had a significant impact on my overall well-being.
Positive affirmations are powerful statements that can help shift your mindset towards a more optimistic and self-empowered outlook. Here are some examples:
“I am capable of achieving my goals and dreams.”
“I am worthy of love and respect.”
“I am resilient and can overcome any challenges.”
“I believe in my abilities and trust myself.”
“I am in control of my thoughts and emotions.”
“I embrace change and grow with every experience.”
“I am grateful for the abundance in my life.”
“I am at peace with my past, present, and future.”
“I am constantly evolving and becoming the best version of myself.”
“I deserve happiness, and I choose to be happy.”
“I attract positive and supportive people into my life.”
“I love and accept myself unconditionally.”
Taking care of your physical health is also vital. This encompasses maintaining a balanced diet, getting enough restful sleep, and engaging in regular exercise.
Listening to your body is an essential practice of self-care. It involves paying attention to physical cues, such as pain, fatigue, or discomfort, and responding accordingly. Pushing through pain or ignoring warning signs can lead to injury or worsen existing health issues. Tuning into your body’s signals and respecting its limitations is a form of self-compassion.
Just as important, seeking necessary medical care is integral to caring for your physical health. Regular check-ups with healthcare professionals, screenings, and addressing health concerns promptly are vital components of this self-care aspect. These actions enable early detection and prevention of potential health issues, ensuring you receive appropriate guidance and treatment when needed. Take it from an oncology nurse who has seen first hand, early detection saves lives, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!
Nurturing your spiritual side is an intrical part of self-care. It involves finding meaning and purpose through various means, including religious or spiritual practices, connecting with nature, or engaging in activities aligned with your values. This form of self-care provides inner nourishment, creating a sense of peace and fulfillment. It’s a personal journey that varies for each person, offering a source of strength and clarity to navigate life’s challenges.
Nurturing your spiritual side doesn’t have to look like the cookie cutter version of attending weekly church services. It can include meditation and mindfulness that cultivate inner peace and self-awareness. Spending time outside in nature encouraging a sense of interconnectedness with the world. Yoga promotes balance and alignment. Journaling and reading deepen your understanding of yourself and the world around you. Self-reflection and prayer fuels personal growth and connection with God. Volunteering provides fulfillment and purpose. Religious or spiritual rituals offer structure, community, and guidance, while connecting with like-minded communities provides support. These practices collectively contribute to a more meaningful connection with your inner self and the world around you. Whether through meditation, nature walks, or purpose-driven actions, spiritual self-care contributes to a deeper sense of well-being.
Here are some tips that have worked for me for cultivating a deeper self-care practice:
Begin by identifying your needs and areas in your life that require more attention in terms of self-care. Are you feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or burnt out? Are you feeling overworked and underappreciated? Is your physical health being neglected? Or do you need to nurture your spiritual well-being?
Explore activities that you genuinely enjoy and that uplift your spirits. This could range from reading a book to immersing yourself in nature or spending quality time with loved ones. Experiment with various activities until you discover what resonates best with you.
Prioritize self-care by scheduling dedicated time for it each day, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Remember, taking time for yourself is not selfish; it’s an essential act of self-care.
Be consistent in your self-care routine. It’s not a one-time endeavor but an ongoing practice that reaps benefits with regularity.
Self-care is a fundamental aspect of a healthy lifestyle. By tending to your well-being, you equip yourself to better handle stress, manage your emotions, and lead a more fulfilling life.
Self-care is highly individualized and not a one-size-fits-all approach. What brings comfort to one person may not resonate with another. The key is to find self-care practices that align with your preferences and lifestyle.
Disclaimer: The information provided is based on general knowledge and personal experience and should not be considered as a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment. While I am a registered nurse, I am not your personal healthcare provider. It is advisable for you to consult with your own designated healthcare professional to determine the best course of action for your specific situation for personalized guidance and recommendations tailored to your specific needs.
I recently opened up about my experience with high-functioning anxiety. Sharing my vulnerabilities isn’t easy, but I believe my story can offer support to others. While I usually appear strong, inside, I’ve often felt the weight of high-functioning anxiety. Thankfully, I’ve discovered effective strategies for coping and finding calm. I want to share these techniques because I believe everyone deserves support and peace of mind amidst life’s challenges.
First and foremost, if you suffer with anxiety, I want you to know that your anxiety doesn’t define you. It’s just a part of who you are, and that’s okay. Accepting that has been a game-changer for me. It’s allowed me to let go of the guilt and self-judgment and embrace my anxiety as a natural human experience. (see below for the seven signs of high-functioning anxiety)
There was a time in my life when high-functioning anxiety consumed me, and I found myself engaging in unhealthy behaviors to cope. Looking back, I didn’t like the person I had become during that phase. However, that realization became a turning point in my journey towards making a change.
Managing high-functioning anxiety is a journey, not a destination. There are ups and downs, and that’s okay. I celebrate even the smallest steps of progress I have made along the way.
The first step towards a better path was: Self-Reflection and Acceptance
Acknowledging the negative impact of my behaviors was a crucial step. I took time to reflect on how these coping mechanisms were not aligned with the person I wanted to be. I accepted that change was necessary for my well-being, growth, and peace. While I’m not going to share here all the details of what caused my anxiety, it is important to get to the root problem. Nothing will change if nothing changes.
Recognizing Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
My high-functioning anxiety led me down a path of unhealthy coping mechanisms. Instead of addressing my anxiety directly, I found myself engaging in excessive exercise and restricting my food intake as a way to manage my emotions. Unfortunately, these behaviors only created greater issues. While physically I looked healthy, my mental health was distressing. When an injury caused me to no longer be able to exercise, I finally recognized that relying on exercise as avoidance was not serving me well. It was essential to find healthier ways to navigate and address my anxiety.
Embracing Healthy Coping Strategies
Once I had the determination to change, I sought out healthy coping strategies that would better serve me. In the past, engaging in regular physical exercise had been a go-to outlet for releasing tension, boosting my mood, and temporarily improving my mental health. However, circumstances had changed, and I was no longer able to rely on this particular outlet.
That’s when I turned to journaling and intentional actions as my new means of managing anxiety. I am incredibly grateful that I discovered the power of journaling as a tool for expressing and processing my emotions in a healthier way. At times, my journal entries might seem like a rambling mess, but I’ve come to accept that working through emotions can be messy.
Through journaling, I found a safe space to unload my thoughts, fears, and insecurities without judgment. Putting pen to paper allowed me to externalize my anxieties, making them tangible and easier to confront. The act of writing itself became cathartic, helping me gain clarity and perspective on the root causes of my anxieties.
Sometimes, the process of journaling led me to unexpected revelations and insights. As I poured my thoughts onto the pages, patterns emerged, and I could trace recurring triggers or negative thought patterns that fueled my anxiety. This awareness empowered me to challenge and reframe those patterns, gradually replacing them with more positive and constructive perspectives.
To complement my journaling practice, I started incorporating intentional actions into my daily routine. I discovered that taking small, purposeful steps towards my goals helped alleviate anxiety by creating a sense of control and progress. Whether it was breaking tasks into manageable chunks, setting achievable goals, or prioritizing self-care activities, each intentional action contributed to my overall well-being and reduced the influence of anxiety in my life.
Cultivating Self-Compassion and Self-Care
One of the most significant shifts in this journey has been learning to be kinder to myself. I now embraced self-compassion, understanding that I am doing the best I can with the tools I have at the time.
Nurturing my physical, mental, and emotional well-being through positive self talk has become a daily practice. I often repeat the mantra “Though I (insert negative action here) I still love and fully accept myself.” This might seem a bit awkward at first, but replacing the negative thoughts with positive affirmations is absolutely necessary!
For example:
“Even though I am imperfect and make mistakes, I still love and fully accept myself.”
“Even though I am facing challenges and setbacks, I still love and fully accept myself.”
“Even though I have fears and doubts, I still love and fully accept myself.”
I am worthy of love and respect.
I am strong and capable.
I am intelligent and creative.
I am worthy and grateful for all that I have.
I am capable of achieving my goals.
I am deserving of happiness and success.
I am loved and supported.
I am making a difference in the world.
I AM ENOUGH just the way I am.
Positive affirmations have the remarkable ability to replace negative self-talk with empowering and uplifting thoughts. By consciously choosing positive statements and repeating them regularly, we can reshape our mindset, boost self-esteem, and cultivate a more positive outlook on life.
(In a future post I will be sharing more about true self-care.)
Embracing Vulnerability
As I let go of my previous unhealthy coping mechanisms, I discovered the beauty of vulnerability. I allow myself to feel and express my emotions openly, without fear of judgment. Even when I am judged, I try to allow it to roll off my back without taking it to heart. (Sometimes easier said than done) Embracing my true self, flaws and all, has brought a newfound sense of liberation. It’s unrealistic for me to expect perfection from myself when I don’t expect perfection from anyone else.
Seeking Support and Building a Supportive Network
You don’t have to face these challenges alone. Seek support from trusted friends, family, or professionals who can provide guidance and encouragement. Surround yourself with a supportive network that understands and validates your experiences, offering a safe space to share your fears and triumphs. Also, give yourself permission to break free from relationships that hinder your growth or bring negativity into your life. It’s essential to recognize that if you consistently feel worse about yourself after spending time with certain people or being part of specific groups, it’s time to reevaluate your time investment with them. While letting go might appear daunting or unattainable, I can tell you from my own life that, yes, it is undeniably challenging, but it is incredibly absolutely worth it.
Take Small Steps
Start by taking small steps outside your comfort zone. Break down the larger tasks into manageable chunks and celebrate each accomplishment along the way. Gradually exposing yourself to new experiences will help build confidence and resilience. I recently decided to go back to school to pursue a Masters degree. I found myself overwhelmed with anxiety in the week leading up to each new class. Worries flooded my mind: Where would I park? How would I find the building or room? Would I fail miserably in all my classes? And the fear of looking like a complete fool loomed over me. Yet, as I confronted these concerns, I discovered that they were merely simple tasks, easily conquered with a bit of time and reaching out for assistance. Stepping out of my comfort zone and diving into the unknown has proven to be a catalyst for personal growth and development. It has pushed me to stretch my limits and expand my horizons.
Continuous Growth and Learning
My journey towards self-awareness and personal growth is an ongoing process. I am committed to learning, evolving, and refining my coping strategies. I recognize that there may be setbacks, but I approach them with a belief in my ability to overcome challenges. I have learned to give myself grace during times of transition and growth.
The person I was while dealing with high-functioning anxiety didn’t align with my values, yet it became the catalyst for my changes. If you find yourself engaging in poor coping mechanisms while dealing with high-functioning anxiety, know that change is possible. At first it will be a slow intentional process, it will take consisten work, but it is absolutely worth the time and effort.
Take time to reflect on your behaviors, seek support from others, and embrace healthier alternatives. Your peace of mind and mental well being is worth it.
Disclaimer:The information provided is based on general knowledge and personal experience and should not be considered as a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment. While I am a nurse, I am not your personal healthcare provider. It is advisable for you to consult with your own designated healthcare professional to determine the best course of action for your specific situation for personalized guidance and recommendations tailored to your specific needs.
Below is a review of what the Montare Behavioral Health has to say about the clinical signs of high-functioning anxiety.:
What are the 7 Signs of High-Functioning Anxiety?
Perfectionism: People with high-functioning anxiety may set impossibly high standards for themselves and may become overly critical or self-judgmental when they don’t meet their expectations.
Overthinking: Individuals with high-functioning anxiety may overanalyze situations, events, or conversations, often ruminating on the past or worrying about the future.
Avoidance: People with high-functioning anxiety may avoid certain situations or experiences, such as social events or new opportunities, due to fear or anxiety.
Procrastination: Individuals with high-functioning anxiety may procrastinate on tasks or projects due to fear of failure or not meeting their own expectations.
Need for control: People with high-functioning anxiety may try to control every single aspect of their lives in an effort to reduce anxiety or worry.
Physical symptoms: Individuals with high-functioning anxiety may experience physical symptoms such as muscle tension, headaches, or gastrointestinal issues due to their anxiety.
Imposter syndrome: People with high-functioning anxiety may feel like they are not worthy of their accomplishments and may constantly doubt themselves or their abilities.
Abstract/TL;DR: Imposter syndrome is a struggle experienced by high-achievers who doubt their abilities and fear being exposed as frauds. It is closely connected to high-functioning anxiety, where individuals appear to have it all together but deal with internal anxiety. Imposter syndrome can be exacerbated by external pressures and judgment, such as those found in certain church communities. Recognizing and addressing imposter syndrome and high-functioning anxiety is crucial for personal growth and well-being. Practicing self-compassion, seeking support, and challenging negative beliefs are important steps in overcoming these challenges. Journaling can be a helpful tool in the process.
As someone who constantly strives for perfection, admitting my feelings and shortcomings isn’t something that comes easily to me. However, I’ve made the decision to share my experiences because I believe they can potentially benefit others. Honesty and transparency are important to me, and I truly appreciate your open-mindedness as I share my struggles.
Imposter syndrome has been a constant struggle throughout my life. It’s that nagging feeling that convinces me I don’t deserve my accomplishments and that I’ve somehow fooled everyone into thinking I’m capable when, deep down, I feel like a fraud. It doesn’t matter how many achievements I’ve earned or positive feedback I receive; there’s always that voice in my head telling me that I’m not as intelligent, talented, or skilled as others perceive me to be. I find myself constantly comparing my abilities to those of others, believing that they possess some innate ability or knowledge that I lack.
Instead of feeling proud when praised for my work, I’m often overwhelmed by anxiety. I question whether I truly earned the recognition and worry that some flaw will be discovered, undermining my achievements. It always feels like there’s more I could and should be doing.
For instance, during the pandemic, I took on a new nursing position that was completely unfamiliar to everyone involved due to the unprecedented circumstances. Despite knowing I was a capable and intelligent nurse, the unlicensed and unqualified people I worked with constantly questioned my decisions. They would ask, “Who do you think you are?” or “Why do you think you can tell us what to do?” This was incredibly challenging and frustrating because, despite being qualified and having the Department of Health on my side, I already struggled with fearing being exposed as a fraud. Imposter syndrome certainly didn’t help matters.
While I generally have no issue with self-confidence in my daily life and can easily make decisions, being in a situation where my competence was constantly doubted intensified my fears and anxiety, turning it into a nightmare. Even though I knew I was qualified and had the support of many others, the persistent questioning made me doubt myself. Their relentless criticism fed into my feelings of being an imposter. It was undoubtedly a difficult time, but it also highlighted the importance of addressing these internal struggles, finding ways to build confidence, stand my ground, and overcome the grip of imposter syndrome.
Imposter syndrome is closely intertwined with something I recently discussed called high-functioning anxiety. It’s when you appear to have everything together on the surface but battle significant anxiety internally. I tend to set excessively high standards for myself and worry incessantly about making mistakes. It’s like living in a pressure cooker of feeling perpetually inadequate and fearing that despite my best efforts, people will perceive me as incompetent.
The link between imposter syndrome and high-functioning anxiety stems from the fear of being exposed as a fraudulent “imposter.” The anxiety that accompanies high-functioning anxiety amplifies these feelings of fraudulence and intensifies the fear of failure or being discovered as undeserving. That’s why many people with imposter syndrome seek validation and reassurance from others, even though they often struggle to believe the reassurances themselves. They fear that without external validation, others will finally see their “true” incompetence. (Sounds familiar to the concept of words of affirmation as a love language, doesn’t it?)
It’s a vicious cycle. Achievements are attributed to external factors rather than recognizing one’s own capabilities and hard work. This self-doubt undermines accomplishments and fosters the belief that one is not good enough. The anxiety and self-doubt stemming from high-functioning anxiety only exacerbate imposter syndrome, perpetuating feelings of inadequacy and a constant fear of failure.
Imposter syndrome becomes even more challenging when faced with hypercritical individuals who exploit it for their own gain. These people manipulate and harm you by exploiting your desire to do more, achieve perfection, and master your craft. Unfortunately, I’ve personally experienced this in my own life.
The church community I was once a part of played a significant role in contributing to and worsening my high-functioning anxiety and imposter syndrome. Although it was a place meant to provide support, acceptance, and spiritual growth, I often felt judged and inadequate within its confines. The constant pressure to conform to a specific mold of what a “good Christian” should be created an overwhelming sense of falling short. The emphasis on perfection, both in appearance and spirituality, intensified my feelings of not belonging and fueled the self-doubt that already plagued me. I could outwardly conform to their expectations, but deep down, I questioned whether I genuinely believed what they were teaching. The doubt only amplified my feelings of being an imposter, and I developed a fear of exposure. It seemed as though certain people wanted me to fail, almost as if they were eagerly waiting to hold me accountable for any misstep. Breaking free from that particular church community was initially challenging, but it ultimately provided the freedom to rebuild my confidence and rediscover my true identity.
You have imposter syndrome, yet you always seem so self-confident?! That’s because I am…
I’ve realized that I can totally experience imposter syndrome while still having moments of feeling really confident in myself. It’s like there are these two sides of me that sometimes don’t agree.
There are things that I know I’m good at, during those times, I feel super confident, like I can conquer the world. But then, there are those situations that I’m not 100% sure about, and out of nowhere, this little voice inside my head starts asking, “Are you sure you’re not just lucky? What if you fail? What if you really don’t know what you are doing? What others find out you’re not that amazing?” Imposter syndrome starts creeping in.
Despite the imposter syndrome, I can still have confidence in myself, especially when I’m taking on challenges or doing things I know I’m good at. It’s just that imposter syndrome can sneak in and mess with my head when I am not fully confident, making me question myself even when everything seems to be going fine.
I’m starting to realize that it’s okay to have these mixed feelings. Lots of people go through it – feeling both confident and unsure at the same time. I’m learning to handle this by understanding that it’s a natural part of being human. And by working on this understanding, I can hopefully find a better balance between feeling confident and dealing with imposter syndrome.
This journey of overcoming imposter syndrome is ongoing, and I’m taking small steps every day to combat these feelings of inadequacy. Surrounding myself with supportive people and practicing self-compassion are crucial aspects of my efforts. It may be a long road ahead, but I’m determined to break free from the grip of imposter syndrome and embrace my true worth. Learning to celebrate my achievements and disregarding the voice of imposter syndrome in the back of my mind is no easy task, but with perseverance, it is possible.
Why am I sharing all of this with you? If you also struggle with imposter syndrome, I want to help you find confidence and feel less alone. Practicing self-compassion and reminding yourself of your worth are important steps. Seeking support from trusted individuals can provide guidance and validation in navigating these complex experiences. Personally, I’ve found journaling to be instrumental in my journey. With time, reflection, and support, a more balanced perspective can develop.
Disclaimer: The information provided is based on general knowledge and personal experience and should not be considered as a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment. While I am a registered nurse, I am not your personal healthcare provider. It is advisable for you to consult with your own designated healthcare professional to determine the best course of action for your specific situation for personalized guidance and recommendations tailored to your specific needs.
Resources
The Impostor Phenomenon: Overcoming the Fear that Haunt Your Success by Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes
The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women by Valerie Young
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown
Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover
The Imposter Cure: How to Stop Feeling Like a Fraud and Escape the Mind-Trap of Imposter Syndrome by James Hibberd
The Confidence Code: The Science of Self-Assurance – What Women Should Know by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman
The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Negative Thoughts and Emotions by Christopher Germer and Kristin Neff
Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brené Brown
Abstract/TL;DR:High-functioning anxiety silently impacted my life, causing restlessness and unease. Discovering this condition provided clarity and a path to coping. I realized that my constant striving for perfection and comparing myself to others were manifestations of anxiety. Learning about high-functioning anxiety was a relief and validation. I’ve embarked on a journey of healing, practicing self-compassion, mindfulness, and prioritizing mental well-being. While anxiety still arises, I face it with resilience and support. Opening up has fostered connections, and I no longer define myself by anxiety. Each day brings challenges, but I’m hopeful and equipped to navigate them.
It’s difficult for me to admit what I’m about to share, but I believe that by opening up about my pain and experiences I may be able to help someone else. I appreciate your willingness to listen and I’m grateful for the opportunity to share my story.
Have you ever felt like you were constantly juggling multiple responsibilities, meeting high expectations, and pushing yourself to excel in every aspect of your life? Have you experienced a persistent feeling of restlessness, worry, and an underlying sense of unease, even when everything appears to be going well? If so, you like me, may have “high-functioning anxiety.”
For the longest time, I was unaware of this concept, yet it silently shaped my experiences, leaving me feeling like I was just coping with the challenges life threw at me. Little did I know that the nagging feeling deep within me was a manifestation of high-functioning anxiety, silently dictating my thoughts, actions, and emotions. It wasn’t until I discovered this condition that I began to make sense of my struggles and, most importantly, learn effective ways to cope and manage this anxiety that had been silently plaguing me for so long.
I genuinely believed that I was simply coping with the demands of everyday life. I thought that feeling overwhelmed was just a normal responses to the pressures I faced. I pushed myself relentlessly, always striving for perfection and never allowing my mind to rest. Despite my achievements, there was always a nagging feeling deep within me that something wasn’t quite right.
I don’t lack self-confidence and I am not a people pleaser, but I am highly motivated to know what is expected of me and to do it well. I would compare myself to others, constantly doubting my abilities and fearing that I would be exposed as a fraud. I dismissed my racing heartbeat, sweaty palms and overwhelming dread of certain situations as typical stress responses, not realizing that they were manifestations of a deeper anxiety. I often said “I’m not an anxious person.” Because I wasn’t exhibiting the signs and symptoms of classic anxiety, I was in denial. Convincing myself that I was strong and capable, even as anxiety gnawed at my insides. It wasn’t until the anxiety subsided that I realized how deeply I had been affected by it.
But as time went on, that nagging feeling grew louder, and I couldn’t ignore it any longer. It was like a constant companion, reminding me that something was off. I began to question why seemingly simple tasks would trigger intense feelings. I felt exhausted by the constant mental chatter, unable to silence the anxious thoughts that infiltrated every aspect of my life.
By chance, I stumbled upon an article about high-functioning anxiety. As I read through the descriptions, it was as if someone had lifted a veil from my eyes. The pieces of the puzzle finally fell into place, and I realized that what I had been experiencing all along was not mere coping, but rather high-functioning anxiety.
Learning about high-functioning anxiety was both a relief and a revelation. It provided an explanation for the constant inner turmoil I had been enduring. It gave me a sense of validation, knowing that I wasn’t alone in this struggle and that there was a name for what I was going through.
Since discovering that I have high-functioning anxiety, I’ve embarked on a journey of learning and healing. I’ve learned to recognize the signs of anxiety and to be more compassionate towards myself. I now understand that my worth isn’t solely defined by external achievements or the opinions of others. I’ve started practicing self-care and prioritizing my mental well-being. I’ve embraced mindfulness techniques to ground myself in the present moment and challenge the negative thoughts that fuel my anxiety.
It hasn’t been an easy road, and there are still moments when anxiety rears its head and tries to take control. But armed with the knowledge of high-functioning anxiety, I’ve become more resilient and proactive in managing it. Opening up has fostered deeper connections and shown me that vulnerability doesn’t equate to weaknessand asking for help doesn’t mean incompetence.
While high-functioning anxiety continues to be a part of my life, I am no longer defined by it. I’ve reclaimed a sense of agency and am actively working towards living a balanced and fulfilling life. Each day brings new challenges, but I face them with a newfound strength and a sense of hope, knowing that I have the tools and support to navigate the road ahead.
In future posts I will share some of the things I have learned to help decrease my anxiety and quiet my mind.
Here is some educational information about high-functioning anxiety.
TL;DR:High-functioning anxiety is a term used to describe ongoing anxiety, perfectionism, and a drive for success while still functioning at a high level in personal and professional life. It can be characterized by overthinking, fear of failure, insomnia, people-pleasing tendencies, dwelling on past mistakes, and excessive worry. Treatment often involves therapy, stress management, and self-care. It’s important to consult with a mental health professional for an accurate assessment and appropriate support. Resources for further reading include articles from Cleveland Clinic, Forbes Health, and Montare Behavioral Health. Remember to seek personalized guidance from your own healthcare professional.
Classic anxiety is characterized by persistent symptoms such as worry, fear, restlessness, and physical manifestations of anxiety. It can significantly impair daily functioning and relationships, requiring therapy, self-care, and sometimes medication. On the other hand, high-functioning anxiety involves ongoing anxiety, perfectionism, and a constant drive for success. Despite experiencing anxiety, individuals with high-functioning anxiety are able to function at a high level in their personal and professional lives. They may hide their anxiety from others due to the pressure to maintain an image of success and competence. Treatment for high-functioning anxiety typically includes therapy, stress management techniques, and self-care practices to address negative thinking patterns and perfectionism.
It’s important to note that classic anxiety is an official diagnosis in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), which mental health professionals use to diagnose mental health conditions. High functioning anxiety is not an official DSM-5 diagnosis. It is more of a colloquial term used to describe a specific experience of anxiety. If you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety, it is advisable to consult with a mental health professional for an accurate assessment and appropriate support.
Those with high-functioning anxiety may demonstrate the following traits:
High achiever.
Highly organized.
Detail oriented.
Outgoing personality.
Proactive.
“An individual with high-functioning anxiety may appear calm on the outside but feel very anxious internally,” explains Dr. Borland. “These individuals may try to mask their symptoms by taking control of the situation.”
Recognizing the signs and symptoms of high-functioning anxiety is difficult in large part because people often hide their symptoms. Some common symptoms of high-functioning anxiety include:
Constantly overthinking and overanalyzing
Fear of failure and striving for perfection
Insomnia and fatigue
The need to please others and difficulty saying no
Tendency to dwell on past mistakes
Nervous habits such as nail-biting, hair twirling, or leg shaking
Excessive worry and difficulty expressing emotions
Many characteristics of individuals with high-functioning anxiety are thought of positively, such as being punctual, organized, outgoing, helpful, detail-oriented, proactive, and high-achieving. Others often view these characteristics as part of a person’s personality rather than the result of anxiety.
If you or someone you know is struggling with issues with mental health visit mentalhealth.com
Disclaimer: The information provided is based on general knowledge and personal experience and should not be considered as a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment. While I am a registered nurse, I am not your personal healthcare provider. It is advisable for you to consult with your own designated healthcare professional to determine the best course of action for your specific situation for personal guidance and recommendations tailored to your specific needs.
Looking Joli Good 