Flab to FAB · Health/ Fitness · Lifestyle

The Weight of Happiness: Why Being Thinner Isn’t the Answer

Dressed up as Wonder Woman for a past church event called “Super Saturday”

In our image-obsessed culture, weight loss is often touted as the ultimate solution to unhappiness. Countless ads, social media influencers, and even well-meaning friends perpetuate the idea that shedding pounds will magically bring fulfillment. But for many, the pursuit of weight loss becomes a treadmill of physical and emotional exhaustion, leaving them further from true happiness than they began. My own journey is a testament to this reality: at my thinnest and fittest, I may have looked my best, but my mental and emotional health were in shambles. Only when I let go of the relentless pursuit of thinness did I find genuine contentment.

Years ago, I dedicated myself fully to becoming the “ideal” version of myself. I exercised rigorously, adhered to strict dietary guidelines, and prided myself on my discipline. Outwardly, the results were impressive. Friends and acquaintances showered me with compliments, admiring my fit physique and apparent self-control. It felt so good to be given so much praise, but beneath the surface, I was unraveling.

The mental toll of maintaining that lifestyle was immense. My thoughts were consumed by calories, macros, and workout schedules. I felt immense pressure to maintain my appearance, fearing that any deviation from my routine would erase all my progress. What’s more, I ignored the warning signs of burnout, convincing myself that my worth was tied to how I looked. Even though I appeared healthy, I was silently battling anxiety, self-doubt, and an overwhelming sense of emptiness. I felt the need to compare and compete with those around me.

This precarious balance came crashing down when I suffered an injury that significantly altered my ability to exercise. Suddenly, my meticulously crafted routine was impossible to maintain. Around the same time, I experienced a series of personal losses that shook me to my core. The weight of grief and the inability to channel my emotions into physical activity forced me to confront the truth I had been avoiding: I was deeply unhappy, and no amount of weight loss or fitness could fill the void inside me.

Initially, I struggled to adjust. Watching my body change felt like losing a part of my identity. But as I began to let go of the unrealistic expectations I had placed on myself, something remarkable happened. I discovered a sense of freedom I hadn’t felt in years. By allowing myself to relax and embrace a more balanced lifestyle, I found the space to heal emotionally and mentally.

Gaining weight, something I had once greatly feared so deeply, became a symbol of reclaiming my life. It meant enjoying meals with loved ones without guilt, spending time on hobbies that brought me joy, and prioritizing rest when my body needed it. I began to reconnect with who I truly was, apart from societal expectations or the number on a scale. For the first time in years, I felt whole. I felt happy. I felt content. I felt satisfied.

group of people making toast | lookingjoligood.blog

This journey taught me that the pursuit of thinness often comes at the expense of genuine happiness. While physical health and fitness is important, it should never overshadow mental and emotional well-being. True fulfillment comes from accepting ourselves as we are, imperfections and all, and building a life that aligns with our values rather than external standards.

Today, I am my truest, happiest self. My body may not fit my previous definition of perfection, but it is a vessel for a life filled with purpose, love, and joy. And that, I’ve learned, is far more valuable than any number on a scale. If you’ve been chasing weight loss as the solution to unhappiness, I encourage you to pause and reflect. Ask yourself what you truly need to feel whole. The answer, as I discovered, might not lie in losing weight but in finding yourself.

Laura lookingjoligood.wordpress.com

If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder or disordered eating, it’s important to reach out for support. Seeking assistance from friends, family, or mental health professionals can make a significant difference in navigating these challenges. Remember that you don’t have to face it alone, and there are resources available to help you on the path to recovery. Prioritize your well-being and take the first step toward seeking the support you need.

**I’ve included some resources and references below.**

disclaimer | lookingjoligood.blog

Disclaimer: I am not an expert on eating disorders or disordered eating. The information provided is based on general knowledge and personal experience and should not be considered as a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment. While I am a registered nurse, I am not your personal healthcare provider. It is advisable for you to consult with your own designated healthcare professional to determine the best course of action for your specific situation for personalized guidance and recommendations tailored to your specific needs.

**Resources:

https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/help-support/contact-helpline

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/eating-disorders/in-depth/eating-disorder-treatment/art-20046234

https://www.eatingdisorderhope.com/

https://anad.org/

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/eating-disorders

https://www.theprojectheal.org/

Lifestyle

There Is A Time for Resting and A Time for Blooming

There is nothing in nature that blooms all year long. So don’t expect yourself to do so either.

bloom | lookingjoligood.blog

I’m a bit of a perfectionist. I like to do everything I can the absolute best I can. Sometimes I need a break! Recently I have allowed myself to be in a time of winter. A time to reflect and plan and grow roots instead of flowers. It hasn’t been a fun time for me. I haven’t enjoyed it, I hate winter, I prefer spring and summer, but it’s been a necessary time. Winter will end soon and it’ll be spring again and then the warm days of summer.

The lows of winter are necessary in order to truly enjoy the highs of spring and summer. ❄️🌷☀️🍃

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

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Lifestyle

I Choose Happiness

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Psalm 34:8 Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who trusts in Him!

Proverbs 10:28 The hope of the righteous will be gladness, but the expectation of the wicked will perish.

Hebrews 12:1-2 Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

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Quote

Happiness Even In Darkness

I saw this quote and thought that it was just too good not too share with all of you.

Happiness Can Be Found Even In The Darkest Of Times If One Only Remembers To Turn On The Light.

happiness in darkness.png

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Tips and Tricks

Things I Have Learned

I recently celebrated my birthday!

I had a wonderful day filled with indulgence in lots of delicious foods that I haven’t allowed myself to eat in a while. Look at that Stuffed French Toast!!!

Happy birthday to me! | lookingjoligood.wordpress.com

When I was younger I used to think that being “old” must be terrible.  I was totally wrong!

So far I have appreciated life during my 30s so much more than I did in my 20s.

A lot of that appreciation has come with natural maturity as well as lessons that can only be learned through living life.

Beautiful flowers I got for my birthday from my husband and kids. lookingjoligood.wordpress.com
Beautiful flowers I got for my birthday from my husband and kids.

Here is a simple list of a few of the things I have learned during the first half of my thirties…

  1. Always wear sunscreen!
    That beautiful smooth skin will not stay smooth and beautiful for long.  If you keep getting “just a little burn” everytime you’re out in the sun, it will turn into something less than beautiful as time goes on!
  2. Exercise is so fun!
    I hate to admit is, but before I was in my 30s, I didn’t see the necessity of daily activity/exercise.  I’m glad that this is a lesson I learned at the beginning of my 30s, and I plan to continue with this healthy lifestyle.
  3. I cannot eat whatever you want and stay thin/healthy!
    I really wisht that this wasn’t true.  Unlike the exercise lesson, this one I just recently really learned and I am glad that I have finally learned how to eat healthy.
  4. The book is always waaaaaaay better than the movie!
    I didn’t start reading for pleasure until I was 31.  It took me 31 years to realize that one of the most enjoyable things in my life could be found at the library!
  5. Don’t say I don’t like a food until I have tried it.
    I have always been a very picky eater!  On my 30th birthday, we went out to a very fancy restaraunt for dinner.  Instead of ordering the food “without this” or “with this instead of that”, I decided right then to for once just order it the way it was found on the menu. That meal was one of the best I have ever had, and itchanged my eating/ordering habits.
  6. People are NOT against me, they are FOR themselves.
    Stop and think about this one, this was an epic lesson!!! No one is actually working against me, they are working for what is best for themselves.  It is not about you, it is always about them.
  7. Stop doing things that make me unhappy.
    I’m not talking about necessary responcibilities, I’m talking about the added stresses we put onto ourselves.  If you don’t want to do it, just say no.  Once you say “no” a few times it gets a lot easier to say.
  8. Happiness is not determined by what is happening around you but instead by what is happening inside of you!
  9. It is ok to distance myself from relationships that are not healthy.
    We all have them, those people who we feel obligated to hang out with even though we don’t enjoy being around them.  I refer to these people as fattning food/nap people.  Because after spending time with them I feel like I need to eat something fattening and take a nap.  Just because you have known someone for several years doesn’t mean that you have to stay “close” friends.  If you feel depressed and tired after spending time with someone, it is time to let that relationship go! I always tell my children, you can still be kind to someone without having to be best friends.
  10. It is ok to be afraid, just don’t let fear be the thing that controls me.
    Be motivated by your fear to to things that make you uncomfortable.  Some things are not as scary as you may think they are.  You’ll be amazed at how strong you really are when your fear is faced and overcome. II Timothy 1:7 says “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”

These are some of the lessons that stick out in my mind.  I am sure that there are lots and lots more, but I will save those for another post.  I’m so glad that every day is an opportunity to start over and learn new lessons!

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